The Calder Valley is home to some of the UK’s steepest and most leg-sapping climbs. The southernmost of the Yorkshire Dales- though sitting just outside the National Park – this deep gritstone trough follows the River Calder, while the valley sides offer a mix of winding ramps and brutal pitches that make the whole area a climber’s playground. Historically a textile hub, the valley floor is still dominated by the towering mills of the Industrial Revolution.
It makes for a claustrophobic riding environment, where ruins, rivers, and canals are squeezed into whatever flat land is available. But I’m not here to linger in the basin. Instead, I’m looking for the exit: nine vicious ascents that rise straight out of the post-industrial gloom. I start my ride in Halifax, at the sensational Piece Hall. This Grade I listed building is a remarkable feat of architecture that looks as if it’s been plucked from the centre of Bordeaux or Vienna and dropped in a northern English town.
Composed of 315 separate rooms around its vast central plaza, it was opened in 1779 to sell the woollen goods produced in the valley’s many mills. Since then, the Piece Hall has undergone a makeover, and now houses cafes, restaurants and other small businesses that make it the perfect place to start and finish a ride. Calderdale is famed in cycling circles for its cobbled climbs; in fact, it is second only to Flanders in this respect.
Out of a desire to explore something different, I’ve decided to avoid a cobble-fest in favour of some of the lesser-known but equally savage climbs. Of course, there will be a couple of stony kickers – it would be rude not to try them – but if you want to ride them all, I recommend the spectacular ‘Ronde van Calderdale’ sportive, which runs every spring and loops all the famous cobbled roads together.
(Image credit: Andy Jones)
Rolling out of the Piece Hall, my first task is navigating the carbuncle of Halifax’s road network. I swear I take a wrong turn every time I visit; despite my head unit’s best efforts, it is easy to tie yourself in knots in this asphalt tangle. Eventually, I find the A646- the spine of today’s route – and head toward the first ascent: Halifax Lane.
Venue for the 2003 National Hill-Climb Championships, where Jim Henderson took the last of his five titles, Halifax Lane features 20% ramps and a few brutal corners to warm the legs. The official hill-climb course amalgamates this climb with Birch Lane and Raw End Road to reach the summit.
“It’s a brutal little road that demands total commitment.”
Simon Warren
Legs already aching, I pedal on to Mount Tabor, then descend the famous Stocks Lane hill-climb course back into Luddenden. Here comes an amuse-bouche of cobbles: the dreaded, sadistic Old Lane.
My personal score with this climb currently stands at 2-2- two successful ascents and two “walks of shame”. It’s a brutal little road that demands total commitment; if a foot goes down on these gradients, it stays down. I carry speed into the base, but two-thirds of the way up, the stones become too slippery. My front wheel skews, I hit a patch of dirt, and it’s game over. The scoreboard in my head ticks over: Old Lane 3, Old Cyclist 2. I’ll be back to draw even.
(Image credit: Andy Jones)
High-level roads running parallel to the valley provide an escape from the congestion below, whistling through open country before dropping into Hebden Bridge. Once dubbed ‘Trouser Town’ for its textile industry, the town is now a bohemian creative hub and a key filming location for BBC dramas Happy Valley and Riot Women.
It’s also home to The Buttress: a 21% cobbled killer omitted from this route because I’ve never successfully scaled it on a road bike- and have long since given up trying. Feel free to give it a go yourself, though.
Author of the 100 Climbs series of books, Simon Warren is a leading expert on climbs. He has an extensive knowledge of the climbs of the UK and has ridden most, if not all of the classic climbs in Europe. He can be seen at the side of the road during the UK’s hill climb season, and as an antidote to climbing, is also a mean track rider.
There’s an abundance of cafes in Hebden Bridge, but as I am only 20km into the ride, I choose to press on to the next climb, Mytholm Steeps, which very much lives up to the name. The village of Mytholm clings to a string of tight corners, twisting hairpins and 20% ramps, and this one drags me out of ‘Happy Valley’ with a ferocity that’s anything but. Of all the roads I’m revisiting on this ride, this is the one that catches me most by surprise; how on earth had I forgotten what a leg-breaker the ramp up to the first switchback is?
After a brief stint up high, I plunge back into the valley to ready myself for the dreaded Dog House Lane. Rising from the back of Todmorden, this westward ascent kicks off with a 30% corner that has me breathing through my eyes. It is full-gas and unrelenting; I crawl upward in the shadow of a moss-covered wall before emerging past farm buildings to reach the open expanse of Todmorden Moor – a peaceful idyll a world away from the chaos below. I catch my breath and brace for the return leg.
(Image credit: Andy Jones)
KEY INFORMATION
(Image credit: Andy Jones)
Where to stay: There are more than 80 hotels in and around Halifax, according to Booking.com, with budget options starting at around 50 a night. Alternatively, nearby Hebden Bridge is awash with B&Bs.
Where to eat: Halifax is stacked with restaurants, especially near the Piece Hall where this ride starts and finishes. Try The Bakery Halifax for breakfast, then La Piazza or the Trading Rooms for a post-ride meal. If you want to make an early start, the Hatch Brunch House opens at 8am on weekdays.
Cafe stops: The Calder Valley is sprinkled with cafes from east to west. Stop in Hebden Bridge for the aptly named Mamil Cafe Bar, which is filled with cycling memorabilia, or the Park Life Cafe. There’s also Mr Beans and the Bridge Cafe in nearby Todmorden.
Bike shops: For mechanical fixes, look no further than the award-winning independent bike shop Blazing Saddles in the centre of Hebden Bridge. In Todmorden, you can rely on Cadence Cycle Works.
My fifth climb of the day – the halfway point – takes me out of Cornholme and up Shore Road. Although not as spectacular as others on this ride, it’s still a tough ascent that takes me up to higher ground and has me retracing my tyre tracks down Mytholm Steeps, slaloming through the hairpins and back into Hebden Bridge.
Again, I resist the temptation of the coffee shops, and instead take on another cheeky kicker, looping though Heptonstall via its neatly cobbled high street, and then back down into Trouser Town, where, finally, I can take my rest. While the previous climbs were short and vicious, Cragg Vale is a different beast. As the sign at the base confirms, this is officially the longest continuous incline in England.
The 9km road featured in the 2014 Tour de France and was recently renamed the Oliver Collinge Climb in memory of the local rider and teacher who died from a rare form of cancer in 2016 aged just 28. It’s gentle by today’s standards – 10% at its steepest – and, with only a gentle crosswind to contend with, I’m able to hack up it in the big ring.
The gradient fluctuates but never significantly flattens, the scenery opening up toward the serenity of Blackstone Edge reservoir, which marks the summit. I pause to take stock and let the fire in my legs die down before descending into the bustle of Sowerby Bridge for my penultimate foe: Sowerby Croft.
“My Calder Valley adventure ends not with a bang but an explosion. It goes by the formidable name of Trooper Lane.”
Simon Warren
It was here, in the autumn of 1991, that I got the chance to race against one of my heroes. I was a hill-climb-mad teenager, and when the start sheet came through for the Condor RC event on Sowerby Croft, the man listed last was none other than Chris Boardman.
The then-23-year-old was my idol and the nation’s premier climber, and I was eager to see how I’d measure up. That year proved to be a fine vintage for my ascending – my power was up and my weight was down – and I took eighth on the day. Boardman won, obviously, taking 10 for his efforts – and eight months later he would become Olympic champion in the individual pursuit.
(Image credit: Andy Jones)
With my trip down, or rather up, memory lane complete, it’s time for the finale. My Calder Valley adventure ends not with a bang but an explosion, an atom bomb of a climb that gives legend status to anyone who makes it to the top without walking. It goes by the formidable name of Trooper Lane, and of all of Halifax’s cobbled streets, this is the hardest – it’s one of the toughest roads to ride up in England.
It’s not as slippery as Old Lane, thanks to the sunlight, but it’s steeper, much steeper, hitting 30% at its cobbled peak – a figure that makes Tour of Flanders climbs such as the Koppenberg or Paterberg fade into insignificance. Whose idea was it to finish up here? It’s such an evil road that, once I’m at the top, I’m 10% sad the ride is over but 90% relieved that my legs have held out.
(Image credit: Andy Jones)
In the process, I’ve ticked off some of the toughest roads in the country, absolute classic climbs that never fail to disappoint. I could swear that Old Lane and Trooper Lane get steeper with each passing year – though I’ve no concrete proof of local tectonic activity, it’s the only plausible explanation of my extra suffering.
All that’s left to do now is complete the loop with one last descent back into the maze of Halifax’s road system and return to the Piece Hall to taste the rewards of my labour. After my morning’s toil in the Calder Valley, the goods I’m bringing to trade aren’t pieces of fine cloth but sore legs and an empty stomach. Finding a suitable vendor among the Georgian colonnades, I feast on pizza and raise my bidon to this industrial masterpiece and the formidable terrain that surrounds it.
9 climbs to ride
Halifax Lane
Segment: strava.com/segments/6690955
KOM: Andrew Feather, 5.28
QOM: Annabel Fisher, 8.33
Length: 1,635m
Height gain: 172m
Max gradient: 20%
Avg gradient: 11%
Old Lane
Segment: strava.com/segments/3386216
KOM: Laszlo Panaflex, 55s
QOM: Jade Simpson-Field, 1.50
Length: 209m
Height gain: 43m
Max gradient: 23%
Avg gradient: 21%
Mytholm Steeps
Segment: strava.com/segments/16343511
KOM: Andy Cunningham, 8.57
QOM: Holly Page, 11.54
Length: 3,225m
Height gain: 223m
Max gradient: 25%
Avg gradient: 6%
Dog House Lane
Segment: strava.com/segments/19513443
KOM: Andy Cunningham, 8.58
QOM: Rachel Meredith, 13.43
Length: 2,999m
Height gain: 238m
Max gradient: 30%
Avg gradient: 7%
Shore Road
Segment: strava.com/segments/627919
KOM: Jude Taylor, 6.00
QOM: Laura Tring, 9.34
Length: 1,862m
Height gain: 196m
Max gradient: 22%
Avg gradient: 10%
Heptonstall Road
Segment: strava.com/segments/878156
KOM: Andrew Feather, 5.40
QOM: Annabel Fisher, 8.06
Length: 1,653m
Height gain: 171m
Max gradient: 14%
Avg gradient: 10%
Cragg Vale
Segment: strava.com/segments/16336054
KOM: Roberto Scottini, 14.49
QOM: Beth Harley-Jepson, 19.14
Length: 8,762m
Height gain: 288m
Max gradient: 10%
Avg gradient: 3%
Sowerby Croft Lane
Segment: strava.com/segments/19507981
KOM: Kiki Savdog, 2.32
QOM: Nikola Matthews, 4.38
Length: 781m
Height gain: 92m
Max gradient: 20%
Avg gradient: 11%
Trooper Lane
Segment: strava.com/segments/19508001
KOM: Kiki Savdog, 3.46
QOM: Tracy Healy, 5.51
Length: 769m
Height gain: 123m
Max gradient: 30%
Avg gradient: 14%
